PARENTS & CARERS - Divorce

Page Index

Background

Bringing up children is a difficult enough job, but it is even more of a challenge if you are facing the prospect of doing it alone due to you and you partner splitting up. Divorce used to effect one in three marriages in this country, but the latest statistics don't support the commonly held belief that the divorce rate is going up. In 2008 the divorce rate was at its lowest for many years.

Sadly, whatever the statistics, they won't help you if you and your partner have decided to split up, or even more emotionally upsetting, your partner has simply made the decision to leave themselves. Divorce has always appeared in every poll and survey as one of the top causes of stress, and understandably so. It is a life shattering event with long term life changing effects, especially if children are involved.

In an ideal world, separation and divorce would be amicable, but all too often the exact opposite is true, and in many cases the legal battle over custody, access, property and finances has permanently damaging effects. Nowadays, this doesn't have to be the case, and the legal profession , the Courts and the Government have recognised that all too often in the past children suffered greatly as a result of divorce and have changed the way the divorce process operates.

No one is saying that it's now a painless procedure, it never is, but it is easier and those involved on a professional level aim to make the process one whereby all parties concerns are listened too and where the children have a position of paramount importance.

Terminology & Glossary

In this country, divorce is a civil issue controlled by Family Law, and deal with by County Courts which are different to the usual criminal courts.

If you are in the process of a divorce or about to enter into one, you may find the explanation of some of the legal terms you will inevitably come across useful. Five terms you will come across immediately are:

  • Action (Another name for your legal case)
  • Petition (another name for the main part of the legal paperwork concerning your case)
  • Respondent (the person against whom the case is being brought)
  • Plaintiff (the person bringing the case)
  • Hearing (another name for a case coming in front of a Judge)

Aside from those five there are many more legal terms and expressions used in divorce cases. To help you understand these BEST Advice contacted a leading firm of Solicitors in London, who gave us permission to use a glossary of terms which they have on their website. The pdf file below gives an extensive glossary of terms on the topic of divorce.

Glossary of Terms

The terms are copyright and are reproduced by the kind permission of Hunters Solicitors, 9 New Square, Lincoln's Inn, London WC2A 3QN Telephone: +44(0)20 7412 0050. Their website has a lot of information on divorce which you may find helpful.

The process of getting divorced

Due to the changes in the law and procedure surrounding Divorce, it is now possible for a separating couple to do their own divorce, where they draw up all the legal papers themselves and submit them to the Court. Following the payment of a fee the papers are examined by a Judge in his or her office, without the need for going to Court.

If the Judge finds the papers are in order and the grounds for divorce and the arrangements for any children are acceptable, a Decree Nisi is issued. This isn't a divorce, just a legal document which, in effect, says the parties are entitled to get divorced and you will have to wait a further six weeks until a Judge issues the Decree Absolute at which point you are officially single again.

There is no requirement for either party to attend any part of this procedure which takes place in Court but that said, if the Judge finds something in the divorce petition or the arrangement for the children that causes concern, they can ask for the parties to come and see them.

One of the forms you have to submit to the Court is called a Statement of Arrangements and that gives all the details regarding your planned arrangements for the children. The Judge, any Judge, will always put the welfare of the children first and if the proposed terms are agreed by both parties it is highly unlikely the Court will interfere or ask you to alter them. If you can't agree, then the Judge may ask you both to come to Court to see if they can help you come to an arrangement which is mutually acceptable, and he may require you both to have a meeting with a Mediator to try to sort things out.

Mediation is now very common in contested divorces and is used to try and bring both parties on to common ground and sort out the issues on which they cannot agree, but if that fails, and it rarely does, such is the success of mediators, the case will go back before the Judge, both sides put their cases forward for consideration, and the Judge decides the final outcome.

We should point out here that most people's mental picture of a Court is usually that of a criminal trial, with white wigs, gowns and the Judge sitting on an elevated Bench, looking down on the Court and being called "M'Lud".

Although the Judge at a County Court is exactly the same as a Judge at Crown Court the whole procedure is considerable less formal. The Judge will be an experienced and highly qualified legal expert, but will also have enormous knowledge of how to help and advise parties going through a divorce. County Court Judges don't wear robes, gowns or wigs, so if you do meet the Judge don't be surprised to see a smart business suit instead of a robe.

Legal experts like Barristers and Solicitors who are appearing before the Judge don't wear robes or wigs either, and the Court room itself is usually more modern and less austere than a criminal Court, often with all parties sitting around a large conference table.

If you do have to go to Court your Solicitor will tell you the correct form of address to use when you are talking to the Judge and answering questions. If you are appearing without legal representation then simply ask the person at the reception desk what you should call the Judge and they will tell you. (The correct title can differ depending on the rank and seniority of the Judge you are seeing.) Despite the lack of formality, remember it is still a Court of law, and the Judge will expect all parties to conduct themselves accordingly.

The costs of divorce

If you do it yourself the costs at the moment are about £350 which is made up of a fee of £300 paid to the Court when you lodge the initial application with them. This covers the cost of starting the proceedings and sending out the divorce petition to the respondent. During the process you will be asked to swear out an affidavit to verify the information you have given (as the person bringing the case) is accurate and true. This isn't as intimidating as it sounds and is usually done at the enquiry desk of the Court or in a side office. There is a fee of £7.50 for this document. Finally you have to pay £40 for the issue of the final document, the Decree Absolute.

Please remember that there may be other charges if things don't go smoothly (and they usually do) but the Court will advise you regarding this if and when the need arises.

If you use the services of a Solicitor, and sometimes that is unavoidable, especially where there is a dispute between the parties over the children, property or finances, or the grounds for the divorce are not accepted, the steps they take are basically the same, as the legal process remains unchanged regardless of who is filling in the paperwork. Obviously the time scale lengthens due to the time required to try and sort the issues out before going to Court. If you use a Solicitor then the Court fees still apply but you will also have to pay for the time and services of a legal professional.

Location of County Courts (Herts & Beds)

As we mentioned earlier, divorce is a civil rather than criminal matter it is dealt with by the County Court, not the magistrates or Crown Court.

The nearest County Courts to us are:

Hitchin County Court, Park House, 1-12 Old Park Road, Hitchin, Hertfordshire SG5 2JR Telephone: 08448 920550 Open weekdays 09.30am to 4.30pm

Bedford County Court, May House, 29 Goldington Road, Bedford MK40 3NN Telephone: 01234 760400 Open weekdays 9am to 5pm

Luton County Court, 2nd Floor Cresta House, Alma Street, Luton, Bedfordshire LU1 2PU Telephone 01582 506700 Open weekdays 9am to 4pm

The Court staff cannot and will not give legal advice to callers, but they do realise that people can find all the legal procedures very confusing and daunting, so you will find them patient, courteous and very, very helpful. They will give you all the advice you need to complete all the paperwork and will often, if you deliver it by hand, they will look it over to make sure you haven't left anything out. (Don't worry about what they might read, as Court employees their services are bound by confidentiality.)

How long can you expect it to take?

Well, that all depends on how complex it is and how much needs sorting out. The Court will advise you on all the timings and each step of the procedure. As one step gets completed they will tell you what is involved in the next step and how long it might take.

For an excellent "timeline" on simple divorces and a lot of other useful information have a look at the website: Quickie Divorce

If you search using an internet search engine on "Divorce Timeline" a word of warning, most of the site which come up are hosted by American law firms, and while the divorce procedures of California, Florida (and especially Nevada) are fascinating, they aren't much help to you, so click the button marked "UK Search Only."

For a simple uncontested amicable split you would do well to allow a minimum of 12 weeks. Remember that six weeks of that is the legal period between the issue of your Decree Nisi and the granting of your divorce with the issue of the Decree Absolute and that isn't something you can change. Contested divorces obviously take a lot longer and some rumble on for many months.

Useful links

As with one or two other areas of Best Advice, there are just too many internet sites dealing with divorce to name here as many legal firms up and down the country now have sites which not only promote their services but also offer a mass of advice and guidance to those getting divorced, even if you are doing it yourself.

A simple search will bring you back thousands but a few good ones are:

Also remember you can free advice from your local Citizens Advice Office and the details of that are in the CAB section.

Finally, we include a link to a Court Service document entitled Form EX 160 which details eligibility for payment of Court Fees and may worth checking to see if you qualify for help with the fees.

Form EX 160